On the bookshelf of my office I have a half dozen copies of Melody Beattie's original book, "Codependent No More." I find that this is one of those "entrance level" books that help people deal with a variety of issues include divorce, emotional dependence, workaholism, anger issues, alcoholism, child-rearing challenges, drug abuse and more. Anyone who is a caregiver needs to understand the issues of the Twelve Step Program and how to minister to self while serving others. I appreciate her books and give them out freely while warning people that we must add our Christian faith and passages from the Bible to best use what she talks about.
This new book by Melody Beattie (and I believe she has authored more than a dozen books on this issue) brings some of her original thoughts into the 21st Century. She begins by again trying to define the elusive term "codependency" and explains what it is and isn't. One of the greatest challenges is breaking free from what she calls "the control trap." In talking about this she tackles issues such as boundaries, communication, denial, dependency, manipulation and more.
Her book is not always an easy read and I did not find her mental and journaling exercises at the end of each section as being very helpful. However, if you read the book slowly--perhaps a couple pages at a time--you can learn and grow. Also, if you would read this book with someone else you could find it even more helpful.
Section Three contains multiple quizzes as she helps the reader to make a "conscious connection with yourself." Each quiz could probably be a week's worth of self-therapy. Not bad...but I just couldn't take the time to painstakingly track through each quiz. I confess that I had to skip through this section.
I appreciate her focus on God though sincere Christians would argue about the absence of Jesus in most of her chapters. As far as I can tell, she has a very Christian approach but in keeping with her focus on the Twelve Steps she focuses more on "God" (or our "Higher Power") instead of using purely Christian terminology.
Sunday, July 22, 2012
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Mr. Monk Is a Mess by Lee Goldberg
We like Monk.
It's as simple as that. We used to watch the first run of all of the Monk TV programs starting about the second or third year. Then we watched the program until it's sad demise after eight seasons. Things got "wrapped up" in the TV program but the books by Lee Goldberg continued until this fourteenth installment published a few weeks ago.
The last few books continue the story of Monk where the TV program left off and, unfortunately, this fourteenth installment reads as if it is the end of the series. I understand that it may well be unless the "powers that be" decide to hire another writer. I don't want to give away the plot of the book but suffice it to say that many loose ends are "wrapped up" to coin a phrase I used in my previous paragraph.
Strangely enough, I've never really thought of the Monk books as being terribly funny but there are times when you find yourself laughing out loud (Is that what LOL stands for on texts and tweets?). This book has one such page/incident that almost brings tears to your eyes. I also never really thought of the Monk books as really focusing on the various murders. They, like the TV program, are more on character development than anything. Oh, there are a few memorable criminals but Monk and his "family" (Natalie, Stottlemeyer, Julie, Randy, etc.) are really the "stars" of the series and in some ways you just want to know what's going on in their lives.
The TV program was probably a bit more realistic at times concerning Monk's quirks because the books seem to suggest some very outlandish habits. However, obsessive compulsive people can be, what can I say?...obsessive and compulsive.
Monk is a mess because of the possibility of seeing Natalie move to the East coast with Monk deciding not to go. Coupled with this is a new friend from the East coast that Monk really doesn't want to give up and also the fact that Monk's brother, Ambrose, is slowly coming out of his shell.
Well, to say much more would mean to give the plot of the book away. Take time to read the book...but you may prefer to read them in order and save this fourteenth book for last.
We like Monk and hope that there will be something to read or see in the future about this unique character.
It's as simple as that. We used to watch the first run of all of the Monk TV programs starting about the second or third year. Then we watched the program until it's sad demise after eight seasons. Things got "wrapped up" in the TV program but the books by Lee Goldberg continued until this fourteenth installment published a few weeks ago.
The last few books continue the story of Monk where the TV program left off and, unfortunately, this fourteenth installment reads as if it is the end of the series. I understand that it may well be unless the "powers that be" decide to hire another writer. I don't want to give away the plot of the book but suffice it to say that many loose ends are "wrapped up" to coin a phrase I used in my previous paragraph.
Strangely enough, I've never really thought of the Monk books as being terribly funny but there are times when you find yourself laughing out loud (Is that what LOL stands for on texts and tweets?). This book has one such page/incident that almost brings tears to your eyes. I also never really thought of the Monk books as really focusing on the various murders. They, like the TV program, are more on character development than anything. Oh, there are a few memorable criminals but Monk and his "family" (Natalie, Stottlemeyer, Julie, Randy, etc.) are really the "stars" of the series and in some ways you just want to know what's going on in their lives.
The TV program was probably a bit more realistic at times concerning Monk's quirks because the books seem to suggest some very outlandish habits. However, obsessive compulsive people can be, what can I say?...obsessive and compulsive.
Monk is a mess because of the possibility of seeing Natalie move to the East coast with Monk deciding not to go. Coupled with this is a new friend from the East coast that Monk really doesn't want to give up and also the fact that Monk's brother, Ambrose, is slowly coming out of his shell.
Well, to say much more would mean to give the plot of the book away. Take time to read the book...but you may prefer to read them in order and save this fourteenth book for last.
We like Monk and hope that there will be something to read or see in the future about this unique character.
Sunday, July 8, 2012
The Amazing Spider Man (2012)
Contrary to a mini-blog review I read a few days ago, I found that this was a very good movie...not quite as good as the first movie in the previous series...but very good.
I guess what surprised me was the fact that it was not a remake in any sense of the word of the previous 2002 Spider Man which starred Tobey Maguire. Oh, many of the characters were the same but the origins of the web slinger were somewhat different from the first movie. And Andrew Garfield was a very different character. Thinner. Less of a baby face. Barely able to pass as a high school student. But, wait, I still like his characterization.
For me, after a while the computer generated graphics occasionally got in the way of the story. That's why the first half of the movie was a bit slow for many, I'm sure, but it was laced with a lot of character development. Gwen, Uncle Ben, Aunt May, Flash Thompson, and even Curt Connors (the Lizard) were well developed characters before the computer graphics captured the movie. But even that wasn't so bad. We didn't see the movie in 3D but that was OK. (I tend to dislike most of the 3D movies I saw. It's not worth the extra $2.00 or so and definitely not worth the discomfort of the glasses.)
This movie had Spidey struggling with identify issues and even the horrible promise that he has to make at the end. I'm all in favor of keeping promises but in this case the promise is just too demanding for life itself.
I was surprised at how many people knew Spiderman's secret identity. Well, perhaps it's difficult when you are starting out to get your secret identity in place. But, again, I forgive this as part of normal character development.
Well, I best not pick apart the movie anymore. It's worth seeing. It's enjoyable. It's certainly not dirty or suggestive. And if you don't learn a couple of moral lessons from the movie, what were you looking for?
I guess what surprised me was the fact that it was not a remake in any sense of the word of the previous 2002 Spider Man which starred Tobey Maguire. Oh, many of the characters were the same but the origins of the web slinger were somewhat different from the first movie. And Andrew Garfield was a very different character. Thinner. Less of a baby face. Barely able to pass as a high school student. But, wait, I still like his characterization.
For me, after a while the computer generated graphics occasionally got in the way of the story. That's why the first half of the movie was a bit slow for many, I'm sure, but it was laced with a lot of character development. Gwen, Uncle Ben, Aunt May, Flash Thompson, and even Curt Connors (the Lizard) were well developed characters before the computer graphics captured the movie. But even that wasn't so bad. We didn't see the movie in 3D but that was OK. (I tend to dislike most of the 3D movies I saw. It's not worth the extra $2.00 or so and definitely not worth the discomfort of the glasses.)
This movie had Spidey struggling with identify issues and even the horrible promise that he has to make at the end. I'm all in favor of keeping promises but in this case the promise is just too demanding for life itself.
I was surprised at how many people knew Spiderman's secret identity. Well, perhaps it's difficult when you are starting out to get your secret identity in place. But, again, I forgive this as part of normal character development.
Well, I best not pick apart the movie anymore. It's worth seeing. It's enjoyable. It's certainly not dirty or suggestive. And if you don't learn a couple of moral lessons from the movie, what were you looking for?
Wednesday, July 4, 2012
Book Review - The Coming of the Third Reich by Richard J. Evans
I started reading this book a long time ago and continued to wade through the book until finishing it today. The book is the first of a planned trilogy on the Third Reich. Only the first book was available when I started reading it but I understand that all three books are now completed. I enjoyed the book but right now I'm not sure that I will read the trilogy. Years ago I read "The Rise and Fall of the Third Reich" by William Shirer and also have read several other World War II books.
I continue to be amazed at the circumstances leading to the Third Reich and World War II and especially the extermination of millions of Jews and many others. Our late 20th Century and 21st Century minds cannot begin to fathom the depth of the prejudice and actions which led to this travesty.
However, as you read this book you find that anti-Semitism was not limited to one nation or culture and the roots of anti-Semitism are very deep. This was coupled with the anti-Communism mentality of the Nazis. I'm afraid that some people might excuse one "anti" while condemning the other.
Toward the end of this book and its details about the pivotal year of 1933 the reader has to be astounded by the systematic expulsion of artists, educators, cinematographers, Jews, and many others.
It's a good book if you can dedicate the time to read it.
Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter
Hold on to your hats. You may think that this movie is strange and ridiculous. Well, yes. The premise is strange and ridiculous but I found it to be a very good movie and I enjoyed the triumph of good over evil. I read the book about a year ago and enjoyed the book. It is one of several contemporary books that combines a traditional story with horror themes. They are called "mashups." I was surprised when I saw that "they" were making this book into a movie and I convinced Alice that we should see it. I confess. She didn't really like it very much.
It was filled with vampires and lots of computer generated action. Yes, and there was more blood and gore than necessary and a lot more than I cared for. But the plot was unique and some of the historical scenes were absolutely riveting. Oh, I confess that the depiction of Mary Todd Lincoln just didn't live up to facts but the weaving of the evils of slavery and racism and Lincoln's unique bravery in a variety of situations made for an interesting movie. I understand that a movie about the last year or so of Lincoln's presidency is in the work. Unlike this movie, that one will be factual but they will have to work hard to have a better actor for Lincoln and will have to work hard to keep that movie as interesting.
This movie was described as an action fantasy horror film and it lived up to that. Vampires figure into Lincoln's life as his mother dies from a Vampire bite and his hatred of vampires (and slavery) is based on that fact. Henry Sturgis who happens to also be a vampire enlists Lincoln to do his dirty work of eradicating vampires because he himself cannot do it because of an unwritten code that vampires cannot kill other vampires. Hey...I said it was a fantasy.
Lincoln's friend, Speed, and a boyhood black friend, William Johnson, join forces just before the Battle of Gettysburg in supplying the Union forces with silver bullets. A fight against vampires on a speeding train is truly unbelievable but totally "logical" and heart-pounding.
The movie ends with Lincoln on his way to the Ford Theater. His vampire friend Henry is trying to convince Lincoln to become a vampire himself to continue the fight but Lincoln refuses. The book has a somewhat different ending.
One criticism--I long for the vampires to be a little more human and a little less horrifying. I think that this would have been an even better movie with fewer sensational scenes and a little more dramatic interaction. In that, the book was probably better.
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